tenshinofushigi

Am doing the iPod shuffle meme. Am putting my iPod on random and putting down the first line of the next 25 songs that pop up. No repeated artists, though. Let's see who can guess them :3


1. Stop stalling, make a name for yourself / Boy, you better put that pen to paper and charm your way out

2. Coin-operated boy, sitting on a shelf, he is just a toy / But I turn him on, and he comes to life, automatic joy

3. Don't breathe too deep, don't think all day / Dive into work, drive the other way

4. Picture yourself in a boat on a river / With tangerine trees and marmalade skies...

5. I had him! His throat was bare beneath my hands! No, I had him! His throat was there and he'll never come again...

6. Down once more to the dungeon of my black despair, down we plunge to the prison of my mind!

7. Hey kids, shake it loose together / The spotlight's hitting something that's been known to change the weather

8. Do you still walk the streets at night, with that wanderlust you fight? Back to the corner where we went our seperate ways?

9. She's going out to forget they were together / All that time, he was taking her for granted

10. Some folks like to get away, take a holiday from the neighborhood / Hop a flight to Miami Beach or to Hollywood

11. You belong to the gang, and you say you can't break away / But I'm here with my hands on my heart

12. I found a letter that said "I'm sorry that you were asleep when I wrote these words down / You'd think I ought to be used to that by now"

13. I wanna hold them like they do in Texas, please / Fold 'em, let 'em hit me, raise it baby, stay with me

14. I'm gonna fight 'em off / A seven-nation army couldn't hold me back / They're gonna rip it off / Takin' their time right behind my back

15. I found the cure to growing older / And you're the only place that feels like home / Just so you know, you'll never know / But some secrets were meant to be told

16. Help me if you can / It's just that this is not the way I'm wired, so could you please / Help me understand / You've given into all these reckless, dumb desires

17. Coming out of my cage, and I've been doing just fine / Gotta gotta be down because I want it all / It started out with a kiss, how did it end up like this? / It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss

18. She was more like beauty queen from a movie scene / I said don't mind, but what do you mean I am the one?

19. I am a little bit of loneliness, a little bit of disregard / Handful of complaints but I can’t help the fact that everyone can see these scars

20. I'm the son of rage and love, the Jesus of suburbia / The Bible of none of the above

21. Tommy used to work on the docks / Union's been on strike / He's down on his luck, it's tough

22. There are few who deny, at what I do I am the best / For my talents I'm renowned far and wide

23. So if you're lonely, you know I'm here waiting for you / I'm just a cross-hair, I'm just a shot away from you

24. Drugs, give me drugs, give me drugs, I don't need 'em / But I'll sell what you got / Take the cash and I'll keep it

25. Out from the night, from the mist, steps a figure / No one really knows his name for sure / He stands at six-foot-six, head and shoulder / Pray he never comes knocking at your door

Hello there, Livejournal. Sorry I keep abandoning you :<

So, the big event of my week was: Mom and I got into a car crash last Wednesday. It was about as fun as you'd imagine.

Basically, Mom was driving me to work and as we were driving through an intersection, a guy coming the opposite way tried to do a left turn in front of us. We weren't going very fast, so Mom tried to swerve out of the way, but the guy didn't even see us and kept going (I remember watching and thinking 'oh my god we're gonna hit him and having a flashback to driver's ed), and our front crashed into his passenger side.

(Thing I did not know until then: airbags reek.)

Sorta-luckily, there was a plainclothes cop right there who took charge of the situation (which was good, because me and Mom were both in shock). Mom had me call 911 and then call my uncle (a cop) to come get us because our ride was now gone. I felt really bad for her because she kept crying all throughout, even though the accident wasn't her fault.

Our car got totalled with the front getting crumpled (sorta-luckily, Mom was driving my brother's car, which already very old and not very valuable), while the other dude's car got smashed, with shattered glass from the windows all over the street.

The craziest part was that this all happened about three blocks from where I work, so two coworkers stopped to ask what had happened, and I got texts from two more. And when I went back to work later that week, it turned out everyone saw it.

Uncle Ronnie drove us to the hospital and me and Mom went to the ER; Mom had banged up her foot and her knee while my chest was in agony from slamming into the seat belt (I had never heard of a 'seatbelt tattoo' before, but boy did I have one). Mom was given an orthopedic shoe to walk in because her toes got scraped up, and I got a presciption for pain medication (its been working beautifully but my chest still acts up if I hiccup or sneeze).

So yeah. The good thing was that no one got hurt, but it was still scary as fuck. Luckily, Mom's foot is okay now and my chest is miles better than it was. And we don't think the other guy is going to sue us (though Dad, ever the lawyer, took tons of pictures in case he does).

I think I'm gonna try and do NaNoWriMo this year. God help me. I really must be insane. (But I have a good idea this time! Really!)

Am honest-to-God happy with how life has been unfolding these last several weeks (minus, you know, the breakup). One of the things I worried about happening when I graduated and started working full-time was that I would stop going out and doing stuff and seeing my friends. To my genuine surprise, I actually seem to have more of a social life now that in college (I blame all those art projects >.>). Thursday, me and Kiera are hitting up some photo galleries, Friday I'm going to a church friend's wedding, and Saturday I'm going for sushi and a movie with Erika and Alison.

And then next week: ROCKY HORROR MIDNIGHT SHOWING. Yeah, I'm excited.

Unfortunately, I am still mulling over the breakup still and get really inordinately angry over it. (I don't anger too easily, but Goddddd can I hold a grudge. I'm an Irish girl, that combo made it inevitable.) Am trying to assuage my anger with the fact that my ex appears to have not gone out with friends to do anything fun in like six weeks, and basically has spent all of his time making Facebook statuses about video games that no one replies to.

I need to draw more. I've been putting that off for so long. Maybe tomorrow morning I'll get some done...

Just for fun, because I've been listening to a lot of classic rock lately.


Can you guess which class rock songs these lyrics belong to? (No artist repeats, if that's any help.)


1. And if you go chasing rabbits and you know you're going to fall, tell them a hookah-smoking caterpillar has given you the call. Go ask Alice when she's ten feet tall. White Rabbit by Jefferson Airplane, ihu2carl and mortally

2. And while Lenin read a book on Marx, the quartet practiced in the park, and we sang dirges in the dark the day the music died. American Pie by Don Maclean, indemnifies

3. But the film is a saddening bore, for she's lived it ten times or more.

4. Come gather 'round, people, wherever you roam, and admit that the waters around you have grown. The Times They Are A'Changing by Bob Dyan, carolpent

5. Didn't mean to make you cry, if I'm not back again this time tomorrow, carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters. Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen, indemnifies

6. Do you think you'll be the guy to make the queen of the angels sigh? Hello, I Love You by The Doors, ihu2carl

7. Hello, darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again. Sound of Silence by Simon and Garfunkel, carolpent


8. I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together. I am the Walrus by The Beatles, ihu2carl and twilight_rain

9. I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints. Only the Good Die Young by Billy Joel, indemnifies

10. I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation. Bad Reputation by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts, indemnifies

11. It's whispered that soon, if we all call the tune, then the piper will lead us to reason.

12. Is this the M.P.L.A? Or is this the U.D.A? Or is this the I.R.A? I thought it was the U.K. Anarchy in the UK by the Sex Pistols, carolpent

13. Mommy's alright, Daddy's alright, they just seem a little weird. Surrender by Cheap Trick, blackiechuu

14. Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste. Sympathy for the Devil by The Rolling Stones, ihu2carl

15. There must be some kind of way out of here, said the joker to the thief.

16. Things they do look awful cold, I hope I die before I get old. My Generation by The Who, carolpent

17. We don't need no education, we don't need no thought control. Another Brick in the Wall Pt. 2 by Pink Floyd, ihu2carl

18. You almost had your hooks in me, didn't you dear? You nearly had me roped and tied, altar-bound, hypnotized. Someone Saved My Life Tonight by Elton John, twilight_rain

19. You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave. Hotel California by The Eagles, ihu2carl

It's been four days since Peter dumped me and I'm mad at him. Once the shock wore off, I think the dam burst and all of my hurt and anger appeared. And, sad to say, I am focusing on this a lot more than I should.

I'm pissed. He dumped me for reasons he won't share -- "personal revelations" or whatnot that he refused to tell me, choosing to act mysterious. And while I admit that figuring things out via phone was something I wanted, I would have liked more than a two minute conversation. Literally, his end of the conversation was like, "Yeah...it's over. Sorry about all this." Two years together, and that was all he could muster. I asked him some questions after ("And you still don't know why you feel like we should break up?" "....yeah." "And you don't know what made you start feeling like this?" "...yeah.") but he could barely bother to respond.

Lately I've been going over every flaw of his in my head, because I'm just that petty. And honestly, it feels good. People have suggested writing them down and burning the list, which I think I may do.

God, this whole thing is making me such a stereotypical ex, but I don't care. I saw that people on Facebook were calling him out on how he's such a negative, whiny person and it made me feel triumphant. I wouldn't be shocked if his constant negativity was part of what led to this.

Whatever. He's gonna regret this sooner than I will. I'm okay with moving forward and being single. But him? He's not gonna find another girlfriend anytime soon, not when all he does is play video games at home and wonder why he has no job (hint: because he has barely any work experience and doesn't want to work retail, in an office, or any place involving manual labor). I'm gonna be fine. He's the asshole. If he wants to be alone, congrats, he can be all alone.

I just wish I could stop lingering over this.

I never really realized how freaking time-consuming working full-time is. Though, to be fair, Slomin's is extra time-consuming, since it's not a 9 to 5 job, it's more usually a 12-8 or 10:45 to 6:45. And they schedule you for weekends. And it is so physically tiring.

Still, I'm actually really content with working. Because even though I liked Gadgets and Gizmos, I was only there about 15 hours a week, and the rest of the time I was just slacking. And I would go to bed at night feeling guilty at night for the fact that I wasn't getting anything accomplished. Nowadays, I don't feel guilty for my relaxation time (what little I get) because ohmygod I am so tired.

I also feel good about getting out and doing stuff more lately. I'm still in choir and I'm in a new bowling league. I've been going to the city a decent amount (went to San Gennaro last Saturday, and next weekend is Comic Con!!!). And I've been keeping up a decent amount of correspondence with friends from high school and college.

Also, my 86 year-old grandma went in for knee surgery on Monday. I know that doesn't sound like something to necessarily be happy about, but: by Saturday, she was walking a full 100 yards to go around a park with my dad. My grandma kicks ass.

The only major black cloud lately is, as usual lately, the boyfriend situation. I'm going to call him tonight, because our One Month Seperation Trial ends this week, and I need this sorted out. Either way it ends up, I'll be okay, but I need to know where he stands. And if he's still waffling, then it's over. I am not going to keep waiting for someone who can't muster any stronger feelings than "I might maybe still like you as a girlfriend but I'm not sure".

So, my life has gotten infinitely crazier in the last week.

The major piece of news is I HAS A JOB. A job that is not retail! ...it's door-to-door salesmanship! Which you could argue isn't that far off, and then I would point to fifteen dollars an hour plus commission what is this madness. I also get benefits. I am still boggling at that.

I also interviewed for an incredibly similar position at a company working with Verizon FiOS. They were very nice but very hardcore about making absolutely sure I wasn't some crazy ass criminal come to invade their office.

Also, I really need to learn to drive, because I have now spent most of the week sitting waiting for a bus of some kind.

Today I filled out paperwork for my new job. You would think that would be simple. You would be wrong. It took five hours, because the towns of Hempstead and Oyster Bay are incredibly hardcore about people selling stuff. I now have a Peddler's License for Hempstead, which makes me feel like a Legend of Zelda character (Peddler offered Heating Policy for 12 Rupees!).

So, essentially, New Job is Eating My Life, But That is Okay Because I HAVE A NEW JOB.

Am gonna see if I can juggle this and Gadgets & Gizmos 'til I'm sure if I want to work for Slomin's Shield, but at the moment prospects look good.

Off to Wedding #3 of this summer. Unfortunately, this is the one that's four hours away and where I will know no one. TIME TO GET HAMMERED.

And I'm already faltering on my pledge to keep this checking/using this thing. Go me.

Coming up is The Week of Weddings; my cousin Will is getting married tomorrow, then my family friend Tracy is getting married next weekend. Which meant that today was spent running around getting my nails done and my hair chopped and buying cheap makeup. WHEEE.

Am getting more and more frustrated with myself. Haven't been productive at all this summer; I'm still in summer vacation mode even though I'm out of school. Which means that whenever I relax I've got the constant self-criticizing voice going, telling me I don't deserve to. But then when I try to accomplish something, it tells me whatever I'm making doesn't look good enough, and why am I drawing on copy paper anyway, why can't I buy more oh wait because I can't drive to the art store, and why don't I have my license yet that's ridiculous, and shouldn't you be applying for jobs and getting your license, and didn't you say you'd make more business cards and leave-behinds, and how are you ever going to get paid for art if all your work is retail, and shouldn't you be more motivated, and aren't all your college friends better at this than you (and why haven't you seen them, you suck at keeping up with everyone and you're going to lose them all as friends because even if you wanted to see them you can't drive....)


The constant noise in my head is really really driving me up the wall, and it only seems to calm down when I'm out with people when I'm out with friends or (I can't believe I'm saying this) at work.

I don't even know what to do about it.

WTF is with Plurk? It keeps redirecting me to a site called mediaplex.com?

Today could be called Adventures in Hurting Myself. To start:

1) I tried using an Oxy pad on my face for the first time in, like, two years. And kind of overdid it on two sections of my face, so now I have two gigantic scabs on my left cheek and my chin. I've been feeling a wee bit like the Phantom of the Opera. ("Don't look at half of my face! DONT LOOK AT HALF OF MY FAAAAACE!")

2) Before work today, I bought liquid foundation for covering my hideous scabs from the fragile psyches of the customers. Unfortunately, my scabs were open scabs, and this being liquid concealer, I spent several long seconds cursing into a bathroom mirror. STINGINGSTINGINGOWOWOWOWFUCK!

3) At work, a group of kids managed to topple one of these bad boys off the shelf, and it seriously shattered everywhere. And of course, Gadgets and Gizmos is completely ill-stocked, meaning we had no: 1) brooms, 2) dustpans, 3) vacuums, or 4) band-aids for when I inevitably managed to slice my finger. And apparent G&G policy is "no running for bandaids unless you're on break". Lord help us all.

Also managed to hit my knee with my ball during bowling. I AM A GENIUS, YOU GUYS.